From Paul's Journal: Tyrants and Thieves

There is a weight associated with a relationship that looks ahead to marriage. There is a heavy burden, it seems, to truly be the man that God has called me to be. I feel it pressing down on my shoulders as a squat bar digging into my bones and causing me to buckle down and focus on the goal ahead. There is a responsibility that I feel I have taken on. I have not yet made the commitment, evidenced by a wedding ring, but I will be tasked with the duty and great delight to provide for my wife, treasure her, protect her, honor her, and, without hesitation, lay down my life for her -- and this does not necessarily mean dying, though that is there as well.

Also, I will be charged to lead my wife. Leadership should be the expectation of all men. We are all called to lead in some way or other, but few take this seriously. Leadership is a fine line, and not for the faint of heart. There are many men who attempt to call what it is they do leadership, but they are deceived and sadly mistaken.

Some are thieves; they steal, kill, and destroy like their father. The thief takes what he wants, and in the end never really wants what was taken. Indeed, what he took did not belong to him, but neither does it become his. He will never be satisfied; he grasps for every rose within his reach, causing all to wilt.

Some are tyrants; they overpower, rule, and dominate like their father. The tyrant abuses and controls, but will never control his abusive power. Under the tyrant, there is no freedom until death do you part.

And some are leaders; they serve, understand, and love like their Father. With humility, the leader serves. With patience, he listens. He recognizes that he has been forgiven much, and therefore loves much. Because of the life Jesus is living through him, the leader is patient, kind, not jealous; he does not brag and is not arrogant, he does not act unbecomingly; he does not seek his own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; he bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.

This is a heavy burden to bear for any leader. It is heavy for any man. This burden is far too much for any son or daughter of Adam to bear. As I contemplated these things, the weight grew even heavier when I decided to ask Rebekah's father permission to begin dating her. This would set in motion the process by which I would one day take full responsibility to lead his precious daughter.

As I sought the Lord that week, I asked Him to give me a promise from His Word.

"Come to Me," He said, "all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."